BoldUlysses.com

Wild morning–I walked up the stairs to the engineering department at 7 only to find everyone sitting around in the darkness. The power had gone out, and we were helpless without computers, and the rest of the plant was pretty helpless without power tools. After I read the funnies in the paper Bob brings in, Bob (another one), Ray, and I spent about an hour walking around our new offices, a work in progress, before the power came on again. Then we had to wait for Chris to boot up the servers so we could access our files… It was 10:30 before any work started getting done. But it was a good change of pace, and kinda fun :o)

Assez mange. Je retourne au travail maintenant…

Three cheese ravioli with Italian sausage sauce. Mmm. Je mange comme un roi. It’s very good… This evening has been pleasant, if tempered with some difficulty. I suppose that’s to be expected, though. I’m trying to find a new book to read in an effort to stay off the computer those nights when I don’t have much to do. I think I will read Cold Mountain. My mom gave it to me as a gift and it’s followed me expectantly many places, but has never been read. Yes, I will do that.

I’m learning two things: Patience, and what it means to have my Hope in Him. God is leading me in new places… All the more reason I wish I had someone down here to bounce things off of and interact with.

*sigh*

That comes back to the patience part, though. I’m in His will; I know this (much as it conflicts with my own, I do have something you could call a peace)… If you’re praying for me, pray that I would take initiative when and where I should, and that I would see more of the possibilities that surround an issue before I make a decision.

Something inside me tells me I’m going to be somewhere else in the world in a year or so. I wonder if this is my own wanderlust flaring up or whether it goes deeper than that. I would like many things. I would like to go to Moody, or return back to North Carolina and take missionary pilot courses at Piedmont Bible College in Moxville. I need to look into correspondance courses and things like that in order to build up my credentials. But at the same time I need to focus on the here and now, hearing His voice, taking things one step at a time. “I do what I see my Father doing,” Someone said once. I will join Him in His movements in the present.

One thing I was thinking about as I was bolting components back on the car (which went well; I got the entire intake plenum hooked back up), as far as a career, I’ve always wanted to do something that little kids say they want to do when they grow up. They always say, “I want to be an artist/pilot/policeman/inventor/astronaut/ballerina/circus ringleader,” never “cashier/accounts receivable supervisor/real estate agent/member of middle management.” It’s just a silly thing, and God will lead me wherever he wants, but it occurred to me then. Do kids ever say, “I want to design boats?” Hmm.

To the gym with me.

It’s all uphill from here as far as jobs are concerned. I really miss JAARS. That was as close as an ideal place to work as I can imagine.

The dark clouds are rolling in again as the sun beats down on the concrete outside. Shades are imperative.

Pretty quiet in here this morning. I think it’s rather ironic that someone without a strong penchant for wine is (re)designing the wine cabinet for one of our boats. They want it to be able to hold six bottles instead of just four… Gee, I wonder why.

The backs of my arms are cold from the air conditionning. It has to be cold in the mornings, though, since the A/C isn’t strong enough to cool the office down during the heat of the day. We’ll be in a new office soon enough, though.

I couldn’t read the book last night. It’s too soon.

Dreams, inconsistent angel things
Horses bred with star laced wings
But it’s so hard to make them fly,
Fly, fly

We have forgotten
(am I in love with this?)
How it used to be
(my constant broken ship)
How it used to be
(don’t go I’ll shoot you down)
How it used to be…
(I’m starting to like this town)

— Matt Slocum, Sixpence

My favorite part of chasing my brothers around the yard was always the instant where they would think I wasn’t following anymore, that I had backed off, so they would back off, only to turn around and realize that I was still back there, closer than ever, and would laugh, wide-eyed, and sprint ahead in terror. It was great fun. And when I caught them we would roll around on the grass, wrestling. I could pin Paul until a couple of years ago… Then he got 6’1 and 220 lbs. Big. Can’t do that anymore…

:o)

The scent of the sand on the beach after a hard afternoon rain is unique… It’s as if the outstretched arm of the ocean, the rains, gently brushed the sands with its fingertips, leaving a salty, pungent residue. It’s like the smell of wet earth, but gritter, more windswept.

And if you set your eyes just right while walking along the shores, the ocean becomes your companion; if you make your eyes the same grey as the waters, they enter in and your mind is filled with the rushing of the waves. You become intimately aware of the wind buffeting your hair, but at the same time, all the sensations merge into one: the ocean, the power, the stateliness of the waves crashing, crashing.

Breathing.

I remember running through the wet grass
Falling a step behind
Both of us never tiring
Desperately wanting

Hmm. I was reading another guy’s journal today as he was gushing about his car, and realizing I do that, don’t I? It sounds pretty silly, doesn’t it? Even if you work on your car yourself… I think I’ll try to stick to less automotive topics in the future. Enough show-offy geekiness. Yeah.

I have another car… So, could we say that my new white Toyota is “Supra-fluous?” Ha. Okay, nobody got that. Well, some of you did. For the benefit of the rest of you, my new car is a Toyota Supra. You may now resume your regularly scheduled programming, already in progress…

I lost a huge beautiful journal entry. I hate my computer.

Bedtime.

Drives at night are compellingly invigorating. I flew around the long sweeping bends of roads along the coastline a few night ago. The top was off the car, and the heater kept my feet and legs toasty while the rest of me shivered a bit. It was chilly. What kept me shivering more than this, though, were the web of stars over my head coupled with the pristine smoothness of the car. The wind swept through the cabin as the speed pressed forward, and I breathed deeply. How I wished I could have closed my eyes, or tilted my head back so that only the stars filled my field of vision, but at the rate I was going most of the time, the road required a bit more attention. Seamless blasts up and down the coastline exorcised the tenseness I felt after battling with the internals of the car most of the day.

Much as I would like to laud the accelerator pedal as the end-all-be-all of stress relievers, there was more pent-up within me than I knew. Even the most precision-crafted machinery, the most forceful delivery of power, or the most edenic back roads could not have dealt with the feelings that pursued my soul. Thanks to the persistence of my God in rendering me peace and speaking words of assurance to me, things are now on the upswing. I will praise Him for this, and for many other deeds. I am lonely, but friendly, stressed, but not overwhelmed, confused, but learning, young, but gaining in wisdom, complacent sometimes, but optimistic, all by His grace. The best is yet to come.

Well, when I floored it, I got 6 psi. All is well. Never mind :o) The car is my most consistent companion down here at the moment, seeing as how Geno is in Orlando visiting a few of his plethora of cousins scattered around the country, and Bob is married with kids and has everything associated with that to deal with. Besides, neither of them are really at the same point in their lives as I am anyway. I did have a good time visiting Bob’s house yesterday, though.

I came over to borrow a bolt cutter for the weekend (which I ended up not needing). I followed his beat-up red Beetle through quiet neighborhoods about 5 minutes from work, past trailers, but we stopped in front of a fence that seemed to only bar the entrance into the woods themselves. After walking through it and getting underneath the foliage, the house appeared. It looked as if it had been built of large slabs of plywood and was surrounded, at least the back side of it, by cages of every size and description. Bob gave me the tour. I was shown four peacocks, two to a cage, that were pacing about but unafraid as we approached the cages. From then I saw an assortment of guinea pigs, chickens, regular pigs, and hamsters as several friendly-looking cats prowled around. By this point I was highly impressed and told Bob this was the coolest thing I had seen in a long time, but the best came next.

Bob opened the door into another section of the backyard, partitioned from everything else. It was his little playground, with all sorts of power tools, workbenches, a band saw, a sandblasting cabinet, and many other things lying about. Then there were the Volkswagens: two Microbuses, four Beetles, a dune buggy mold, and even an MGA roadster thrown in for good measure, all in various states of decay. I think between all of them, there was more rust than good metal, but I still couldn’t wipe the smile off my face, nor did I want to. We went into his shed, where toolboxes and tools were crammed, but organized, around an old BSA motorcycle from the 50’s that he was working on. Bob fished out the bolt cutter while we talked about old cars and mechanic tricks. Everything was dirty and old, but it was his domain; he kept it organized and knew where everything was. I stepped outside as we talked; he lit up a cigarette and procured two peacock feathers for me from their stash (after the male sheds). He talked about working on cars back in the 60’s and how he met his wife, working as a mechanic, living on a trimaran (three-hulled sailboat) he built himself. He told me about his plans for the shop; I volunteered my help anytime he needed it. I would see him at work every day anyway.

He walked me out as his family drove up and we were introduced. His wife had dark hair in one long braid, large dark-rimmed glasses, and was a perfect counterpart to him with his long grey hair tied back in a ponytail. His son and daughter, 7 and 10, looked positively ordinary next to their ex-hippie parents. Had I been their age and gone to their school, I’m sure I would have been incredibly jealous of the two kids for living in a house so amazing. I said goodbye and drove home, and pinned one of the peacock feathers in my kitchen. I work with some colorful people.

Anyone want to race? Anyone? I’m hoping for one of those moments where two competitors vie against one another and after a ferocious battle, decide they’re evenly matched and become fast friends. See? See what I’m willing to do? I’m willing to allow my car not to win in order to secure a friendship *sigh* Oh well. At least stuff worked today. I went to Ace hardware just down the road and had a field day in the discounted tool bin, picking up vice grips, a hacksaw, tin snips, and some other assorted odds and ends for a very reasonable price. I got the rust underneath the battery tray taken care of and Armor All-ed the interior, among many other things. The car looks darn good. Now, where’s that digicam…

I’m still just reading 4 psi on the boost gauge in second and third, though. I know my turbo-to-exhaust gasket is bad and needs to be replaced, which could account for some of that, but a reading 2.8 psi lower than the maximum pressure? I don’t think the stock gauge would be that inaccurate. I wasn’t really digging into the pedal, either. I’ll have to do a couple more boost runs tomorrow. What I really need to do, though, is drop the catalytic converters and fabricate a SS downpipe… That would fix any problems, I’m sure. Perhaps I should get a license plate for the car first?

:o)

The day has been idyllic, if solitary. The breeze is gentle, the sun is clear, and the beach is packed. Summer should be interesting. I wonder if can talk to Rick (my boss) into working extra hours in order to take vacation time over the summer. It’s something I was talking to Geno about over lunch yesterday; that we can’t expect our friends and relatives to work their vacations around the week that the plant is shutdown over the summer. I need to discuss it some more with Geno and Rick. It’s a long shot, but here’s hoping.

I miss her today immensely. It’s been the ideal day to promenade through the streets and alleyways of St. Augustine, fly a kite, or just walk on the beach, basically, to do things that are just no fun to do by yourself. Of course, I don’t miss her presence just for the sake of companionship, but for the unspeakable femininity and tenderness she breathes with every movement… Retourne a moi, cherie. Tu me manques…

It won’t do / to dream of caramel / to think of cinnamon / and long for you

One of my favorite parts about reading a book, most any book, is the way that the phrases and sentence structures tend to filter down into my own speech and writing. The archaic quality of the language might not make it through entirely, but the general cadence of the words, the ebb and flow of the paragraphs manifests itself a least a little. I decided to pick up the third installment of the Lord of the Rings again and am well into it. It’s taking a bit to really get going, but I have no doubt things will heat up significantly before too long. I am reading with great anticipation, however, since all of the more prescient characters, nay, people, in the story have given overwhelming indications that a malevolent doom is emminent, but I have trouble imagining a more ferocious onslaught of evil than what they underwent during the last book… All of the previous predictions have (obviously) been right on the mark, so I am very eager to see Tolkien’s imagination tackle the prophecies he’s set up for himself. As I read, of course, I am increasingly doubtful about the future two movies ability to communicate satisfactorily the range of landscapes and lifeforms the author has conjured up, but we’ll just have to see and watch them and reserve our judgments until the movie is through.

It’s interesting how our moral imaginations are stirred by the depiction of such traditions as chivalry and knighthood and everything associated with the middle ages. The living conditions during that period of time were at least as low, if not lower, than any other period in history, and yet we cling nostalgically to that era rather than to perhaps a civilization more technologically advanced, such as Rome or Greece. Maybe the morals we have ingrained are more directly related to the ones they held them? Perhaps it’s the time frame that’s closer to our own that creates the wistfulness for those ideals… Or maybe the memory of moral deeds and ideals lasts longer than a fleeting new advance in technology. I suppose technology is fundamentally ethically neutral (those some would argue otherwise), the bare mechanics of it, at least–though what is technology? Can a new technology be implemented and exist indepedent of ethical ramifications? Probably not–but that’s a topic for another post. At any rate, the vast majority of us strive to ever better ourselves, to do the right thing, whereas technology, while convenient and certainly pretty cool, simply exists in comparison, it is thus the highest manifestations of our moral aspirations that pull hardest on our heartstrings. It’s just things like this that scamper across the plain of my mind as I read.

I spent way too much money on food last night. I hope it will last me a while. Spices and condiments are like tools–They don’t do a whole lot as far as many dishes are concerned, but each of them is absolutely essential for one dish, so you have to have a full complement in order to make anything. It’s the same with tools. I’m not going to use a 2 1/8 in socket for everything, but I can’t get a wheel hub nut off without one. Then there’s something like a 1/2 inch breaker bar that I use all the time; it’s kind of like olive oil–good for many things. I could go on…

It’s slow. I’m emerging from my early morning funk slowly as well, as the day passes, thanks to the encouragement and prayers of a certain young woman whom I love very much, and others who I love not quite with the same degree of earnestness, but appreciate just the same :o)

Dreary mornings give way to radiant afternoons. The day redeems itself… But that sounds like I’m evaluating the day in light of my own preferences, doesn’t it? Every morning is a resurrection of the light, a renewing of His mercies. I should be grateful for whatever state the day chooses to present itself. It is nice to be able to see the sun, however :o)

I’m tired again. It was wonderful to see everyone this weekend and just reaffirmed how much I need to find a good friend of my own down here. The car performed flawlessly… It’s interesting how word gets around when one has a new vehicle. I must’ve given half a dozen people rides this weekend. ‘Twas fun.

Twenty more minutes, then I’m taking off. I need to get my vehicle running tonight. I worked on it over lunch today and made a little bit of progress.

I’ll be seeing everyone in less than 48 hours. And the time crawls.

Planes and trains and automobiles (and boats!)…

I saw a rainbow last evening. I came home from work feeling that rain was on its way; the sky was becoming more overcast and a cooler wind was blowing in gusts. I was a bit frustrated with the whole situation since I don’t get much daylight after I get off work in order to tinker with the car, and now the rain was going to erase whatever time I did have. It was thin and didn’t last but a few minutes–the brunt of the rain passed north of St. Augustine. A few minutes after it passed off and the dripping had lessened, I headed out to the car with my tools, and there in the eastern sky was the most complete rainbow I have ever seen. Other folks from around the apartment complex was outside admiring it as well. It stretched a full 180-degree arc and was bright and clear with the sun setting at my back. Above it was a faint second rainbow, reversed. Any antagonism I had towards the rain evaporated as I stood there, looking eastward.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been aware of the clear beauty of the morning. Elementary school, actually, was the last time I remember looking around me at the drippy, piercing sunbeams cutting through the trees, and the hearing the sharp symphony of the birds. Today I just sat on my bed, awake, and breathed in the morning air. I wish there were birds’ nests outside my window, but palm trees aren’t the most condusive to nest-building, I suppose. I’m looking forward to daylight savings time and having the sunrise begin an hour earlier, so I’ll get to see it on my way to work, at least for a little while, like I did when I first started back in February. I’m more aware of the seasons now, even in this practically season-less place, because of the changing time of the sunrise. The months pass and there’s progressively more light when I wake up in the mornings.

And suddenly a certain George Harrison song from Abbey Road pops into my head…

Come on, 5 o’clock… :o) I’ve virtually nothing today except print some machinery layouts for Rick. Of course, as soon as the almighty Charlie reviews my drawings, I’m sure I’ll be busy as anything, but there’s no telling when he’ll stop by. He’s just unpredictable like that.

They haven’t set the week this summer when the plant will be shut down and we’ll get off. Turns out it’s been whatever week the first of August falls on for about 5 years now, if that’s any precedent.

*sigh*

I want out. It’s warm outside, but crystal-clear and beautiful.

Slow, slow mornings… Wishing I was elsewhere, but doing my best. At least the printers are cooperating with me this morning. I swear those things have fully formed personalities…

From time to time the office receives various periodicals, some about boatbuilding, some about the industry itself, and some that advertise various upscale yachts for sale. There’s one to the left of me on my portion of the desk–Yachts International Magazine. This thing is just way too glossy. Pages upon pages of megayachts for sale, the huge ones you see at Monte Carlo or Miami. It’s interesting how the majority of people you talk to would say that they would never buy something like that if they had that much money… But who’s to say what your mindset would be if you found yourself that well-off? Granted, I’m sure not many millionaires spring for 100-foot luxury yachts, but there aren’t that many millionaires to begin with, so who knows.

I’m tired and jittery. Contradiction? Evidently not.

We have boost.

I brought the car back down today… and I couldn’t be happier with it. The previous owner was amazing in how meticulous he detailed everything that he had done to the car. It made the 7-odd hour trip from Atlanta down here just fine, with a few escapades along the way. I can now officially put the evil SUVs in their place: “No, the left lane belongs to me. You are not as fast and invicible as you think you are.” Vigilanteism–stupid male thing… I can quit anytime I want…

:o)

I took a scenic back road on the last stretch to St. Augustine. I removed the center panel off the roof (it comes off) and had a nice leisurely (honest) drive back home. I fulfilled a long standing ambition as I was puttering around just above the speed limit, when I came up behind a mid-80s Nissan 300ZX, pimped out, trying to look way faster than it really was, and I could hear a faint thump from the subs in the trunk. I downshifted to fourth, mashed the gas pedal, heard the turbo spool up, and practically sucked his doors off as I blew by… That was nice. My ego has been fed today. I will now put it to bed :o)

Argh… I hate staying late at work–especially on Fridays. All this junk has to be done by Monday, though. :op on upper management and their stupid deadlines.

At least the Taurus (a.k.a. the devil car) is gone… A slightly rednecky married couple came and took it away this morning on their trailer. Thus ends another automotive saga–just in time for another to begin. I’m going to pick up my new (old) car tomorrow in Atlanta. Should be an interesting drive… :o)

The album version of “Godspeed” has officially replaced “Flaming June” as my favorite BT song. I have a demo version but it doesn’t sound nearly this good… This is officially the song I’m going to play first thing as I drive the car back from Atlanta. Well, maybe “Mad Skillz” We’ll see.

My houseguests left a few hours ago. They had to return, as expected, since one of the members of the party forget their keys… That person shall remain unnamed, however :o)

I’m alone again. The apartment is mine. I can hear the wind chimes outside the open window in the living room again. Come back? It’s beautiful here.

My apartment has people in it. It’s quite wonderful, but something of an adjustment, because to my great consternation sometimes, things actually move from where I set them down over the course of a day. It’s okay, though.

I’m making headway into the organizational structure and politics at work, learning all I can and asking stupid questions more often than not. One of the higher-ups in the chain of command really liked a design I put together for a new boat we’re designing. Instant clout in the boss’s eyes. After the compliment by the individual he strives most to please, we’re suddenly on the same footing. It’s nice to be validated.

In other news, I’m getting a new (old) car. Any (positive) change in the automotive arena that affects me personally is a very good thing. In theory, I could have gotten whatever I wanted, but in reality my grandmother is lending me the money since I need the car now, so I had to conjure up some criteria to appease her and my parents, who are in a position to influence her decision to lend me the money. My criteria were:

– Reliable
– Safe
– Reasonably economical with fuel
– Something I could work on (i.e. not too complex)
– Good long distance cruiser (for visits back home)
– Air-conditionned

Of course, all these would be satisfied by the first Camry I came across. They were my primary criteria. My secondary criteria were:

– Manual transmission (less to go wrong–I hate automatics, and more economical)
– Rear wheel drive (adheres to my basic philosophy concerning cars: One end should push and one end should turn)

When you add all this up the only reasonable choice becomes an ’86-’91 Toyota Supra. But once again this did not satisfy me so I went back and added tertiary criteria:

– Good-looking (i.e. well-proportioned)
– Turbocharged

And this narrows it down to either an ’87 or ’88 Toyota Supra Turbo 5-speed. And wouldn’t you know it, I found one in Atlanta; I just have to go retrieve it next Saturday. Pictures sent to me for your viewing pleasure:

1 2 3 4 5

It’s going to happen. It’s inevitable. I just know that one of these days… I just don’t know when.

I’m going to unwittingly trod on a dead jellyfish while running on the beach, and its little soft body will explode and send jellyfish entrails up into my face or something…

I’m fine with everything else, but gelatinous things–no. Snakes: piece o’ cake. Spiders: Oh, isn’t he cute. Lizards, worms: no sweat. But slugs, snails, jellyfish: GETITOFFGETITOFF! NOW!

Like I was telling Erin a few days ago on the phone, if I had been present when God was creating the animals, I would have said, “Y’know, God, these squishy creatures, can we rethink those? Ya gotta draw the line somewhere. Sir.”

It’s my only phobia and I’m sticking by it.

I think I might go home this weekend. It’s Erin’s last fencing tournament of the season, and I’m certainly not doing anything. It would get me out of the apartment, if nothing else, and (not having to drive home 3 or 4 times a week) I haven’t had a good long car trip in a little while. It clears the mind. We’ll see. I’d start tomorrow morning, so I’d have most of Saturday.

In other news, I get to keep a copy of the first part I made. It’s a plastic silverware tray that I modeled in Pro/E and they made in the vacuformer machine. It fits perfectly where it’s supposed to, so I did my job well. Geno congratulated me :o) I now have more stuff to model. I guess this is how one begins fitting into one’s place of employment. It’s affirming, once I get past all the stress. I feel useful, and people are understanding that I may not know everything. Life is quite rosy here when I’m looking side-to-side at my coworkers in the same plane of the chain of command, and not upwards to all the bigwigs who only deal with abstracts and have no management skills. It’s all about one’s perspective. The workday and week have ended on a good note.

An extra half hour would do marvels for my morale after lunch… I’m just too rushed.

I’m waiting for the black beans and rice to cook at the moment, then I shall polish off what’s left of my cornbread and call it a lunch :o)

I was typing at my computer a few moments ago when I heard a loud whistling behind me, like from a haunted house, and a clunk from outside the bedroom door. It’s very windy outside today, and the blinds, which were drawn down over the slightly cracked window, were pressed up against the aperture as the wind rushed through the house, opening the front door (hence the clunk) and creating the whistle as the air was sucked in between the individual blinds. It scared the mess out of me :o)

Rice is done. Have a lovely afternoon, everyone.

I’ve easily polished off at least a third of the pan. It’s far and away my greatest culinary success down here in Florida. They’re absolutely irresistible and fill the kitchen and more with a warm, blanket-like scent.

Brownies. Rich, chewy, pure, fudge-like brownies, mouth-watering in their slightly crumbly yumminess. No nuts to dilute the essence of chocolately goodness spread throughout each square as I scrape it off the pan. So, so good. Yum. I’m going to blow up like a balloon.

:o)

The rain has been coming down all day outside… It’s interesting to live someplace where the weather remains reasonably consistent; i.e. when it rains it rains for a while, and when it’s beautiful, that lasts too. I’ve only been here three weeks, though, perhaps I shouldn’t speak too soon?

There’s a cat outside plodding around the puddles. I suspect it’s out there out of necessity–it looks rather dejected, like soaked cats tend to. And yet it will sit on its haunches for a bit and survey its surroundings. I think if I were a cat outside today I would be scratching and clawing at the first door I came to.

I feel somewhat better. I’m making black beans and rice, and my second attempt at cornbread (since last summer). At least I have actual Jiffy mix this time around. The only problem was that the box didn’t tell me what temperature to set the oven, and being a male, I don’t instinctively know. I set the oven at 350. It seemed a good middle-of-the-dial number. Any verdicts on this?

A shower with a real bar of soap helped, instead of those little wafers I stole from the hotel, as well as some actual Pert Plus, rather than the vial I pilfered. I just wish I didn’t run out of hot water. It kind of stinks, especially since I’m not even running the dishwasher or anything.

Back to The Two Towers while the cornbread bakes. Be back later.

Going to bed much too late–I need more catch-up sleep than this. I have absolutely no reason to complain: I’m a young, reasonably fit individual living in a beautiful part of the world with a good job. And yet I feel terrible. There is some definite spiritual warfare going on here; I’m convinced of it. Every thought I have is dragged down. It’s like there’s no room for optimism at the moment, even if I would make it. The swearing at work is really starting to get to me as well. I suspect that being employed at a place that has some connection to seafaring probably has something to do with it. I guess I’m just thin-skinned. No, I’m not, but three weeks of mis-management and countless frustrations around me at work being vented in such terms grates on my mind and emotions. You prayers would be more than appreciated.

I would lie down now, but I know I won’t fall asleep–of all the nights to be restless…

*sigh*

I got a boat ride today. Rick and I went out in the 40 Open in order to evaluate some defects in the hull–it rolls to the left (“heels to port”) underway… It’s an interesting commentary on the state of quality control here when the hull could have made it all the way through the pipeline to a finished boat with a hull flaw like that. I dunno what they’re going to do, but it was pretty cool nonetheless. The interior layout leaves a lot to be desired as far as I’m concerned, but that’ll be my department, so it’s something I intend to remedy as best I can. The experience was like riding in a giant, amphibious SUV. The big twin diesel engines underneath the helm roared almost deafeningly under full power, and the bow rose up on the water. The helm was in a position of command, kind of like the high seating perch in a Ford Explorer or an equivalent. The diesel fumes, backdrafting through the cockpit area, made me more sick than the movement of the boat. I climbed up top, even, and experienced the helm area up there. It’s a ways off the ground. I suppose it’s perched so high in order to be able to spot groups of fish from far off. I learned a lot. It was neat to finally ride in one of the boats I’ll be designing.

Geno, Greg, and I went to Larry’s Subs for lunch. We’re thinking about making it a Friday tradition. It’s payday, after all. I had a foot-long meatball sub. Mmm. Not up to Jersey Mike standards but still yummy.

It’s rainy now, and grey outside.

I think the stress is getting to me again like it did a couple of weeks ago. I really do not feel good. It’s Friday, even. The weekends are so short now; only two days like they’re supposed to be, I reckon. Is it good that as soon as I arrive I can’t wait for the day to be over? Normal, perhaps, but after three weeks of work?

*sigh*

Okay. I’ll make it. His Word says that we shall run and not grow weary… I wonder if sitting behind a desk and plugging away at a stupid computer program would still qualify for that promise?

It’s a slow afternoon at work. I’m making a little bit of headway here establishing my position. All the guys are great, which helps a lot with not getting too discouraged. Triscuits are addictive also, by the way.

I really really want a nap. In the sunshine. And the breeze.

I need to run when I return, though. I think it will be an easy run. Unfortunately Geno (one of my coworkers) ran last night so he’s not up to it today. Maybe later on in the week or next week, though.

I’m sleepy.

I decided not to go to Miami. I have lots of things I can be doing here on my day off, important things, and I don’t want to drive 10 hours today only to fight my way into a parking space. I can be more productive here, and I was very, very tired this morning. So there :o)

This weekend was absolutely wonderful. The weather even behaved for us, which I wasn’t sure it would do. Erin and Elyse made it here and back just fine in their car of dubious reliability, and we had great fun walking leisurely through downtown St. Augustine, browsing the shops and absorbing the atmosphere. Dinner that night was great as well, even if I did get a bit ill from the wine.

But the apartment is empty again. It’s neat and boring. Perhaps I should make a mess or raise a ruckus just for variety… No, that would just be dumb, and no fun besides when I’m by myself. Messes and ruckuses are so much more fun when you have a partner (or partners) in crime. Well, it’s off to the bank and the DMV and the Y and perhaps the haircutters for me :o)

Whitecaps this afternoon, and all of today, actually. Lots of them. It was a blustery day, which made running down the beach rather difficult, but the return trip was a doozie :o) The ocean is beautiful in the evening. The lavender clouds span their darkening limbs across the sky, reaching desperately for the opposite horizon. The ocean churned under the assault of the wind, sending tufts of sea-form skittering across the smooth sand from the edges of the waves. It was breathtaking, which understandably made running all the more tricky.

Happy Valentine’s day, all, and happy 21 to Erin.

I finally finished putting all my posters and pictures up around the apartment. Only after doing so, though, I realized that they’re all at a comfortable height for me, i.e. eye level or so, which might be more than a little high for the 50th percentile. Oh well. It’s my apartment :o)

I was cutting pictures out of a calendar to place up earlier, and I was playing a George Winston record, beautiful, lilting piano music, and the silvery sound of wind chimes outside someone else’s apartment came through the open window, weaving its way around the notes of the piano… I paused for a minute or two and just listened.

To bed with me. No more 1 a.m. updates for a while, I’m afraid.

This has to be quick–the computer gurus will return any minute and go to work on my machine again. At least I have my own…

It’s drippy outside. I heard what must have been some native Floridians complaining about the general clamminess… I almost went up to them and said, “You have no idea.”

:o)

Oops, back to work.

A misty rain is falling outside… It was heavier earlier, and the office lost power for a fraction of a second–just long enough to cut the computers off. One good thing about using the boss’s computer is that it has a backup so you don’t lose anything :o) Some colorful words were being passed around outside the boss’s cubicle, though…

I swear I’ve called like 15 places. They’re either in sketchy neighborhoods, or the rent is too high, or they have a waiting list months long. If the visit I have scheduled this afternoon to an apartment complex doesn’t pan out, I’m going to go with the first apartment, the one practically on the beach.

“You Better Get This Party Started” by Pink came on the radio as I was driving to get lunch in the rain. It had been a little while since I had heard it last, so I started kinda moving a little bit to it, cocking my hand on the top of the steering wheel, etc, when the irony of it all dawned on me as she sang, “We’ll be lookin’ flashy in my Mercedes-Benz…” and I was cruising around in a dented Taurus station wagon. Yeah.

The supermarket Publix is the embodiment of Le Corbusier’s vision for society in the 1920’s. The aisles are spotless, everyone is unerringly friendly; the cashier smiles a smile that doesn’t seem by rote as she hands me my change. It’s like shopping in a parallel universe, one where humanity’s basic instincts are good and all malice has been tempered out of society. Very surreal.

Another furtive entry at the boss’s desk, while working on Pro/E… It’s actually coming along pretty well–Geno just taught me how to put drafts into the parts; it’s remarkably similar to SolidWorks, the modeling program I used over the summer, so I anticipate a few months before I achieve guru status (just kidding).

I got to rub shoulders with the big bosses yesterday. One of the guys from Hunter (the sailboat division of the company) came over here to Luhrs, and I accompanied him to check out a 30-footer prototype that had just been completed and was sitting just inside the big warehouse. While there, Mr. Warren Luhrs (the owner of the whole kit and caboodle), who lives up in New Jersey or some such place, dropped by, as he is prone to do, to check out the boat with some other bigwigs. I met him; he seemed very personable and actually remembered my name at the end, something by which I was very impressed. The bigshots and I spent a good two hours in the cabin of the prototype discussing minor tweaks and alterations in preparation for the annual Miami boat show. I didn’t say much, but offered my opinion a couple of times, and (I believe) was met with general approval. It was a confidence-booster and helped me learn a lot about what’s involved in production, just being there and talking about various aspects of the boat. ‘Twas cool.

My search for a relatively inexpensive, decent apartment has been unfruitful lately. There’s a good chance I might get the one the romantic side of me really wants to get but the practical side has minor reservations about. It’s not terribly cheap, but I did budget for it, and if I found a roommate, things would be ideal. It’s a two-bedroom, one and a half bath that’s about two blocks from the beach. Anybody want to move to St. Augustine? Only $350 a month… No psychos, please.

And every stop is neatly planned
For a poet and a one-man band

No, I haven’t found an apartment yet. I haven’t even gotten my own computer at the office yet :o) I’m using the boss’s while he’s out for a couple of days. I have to learn Pro/Engineer somehow… This entry still feels a bit clandestine, however. I’m here, and I’m fine. The trip went quickly, the car held up, and I’m in a halfway decent hotel searching for an apartment with all my spare time. Orientation here at Luhrs was this morning, and incredibly boring. I swear I used all the ink in the pen they gave me signing forms. But I read them all, don’t worry :o)

Everyone here is great. There are even two cars guys up here in the engineering department. One is into old cars and working on them, and the other one is into racing and everything related to that, so both hemispheres of the car-loving part of me are satisfied. Oops, I think I need to get back to the tutorial before somebody looks over my shoulder.

Have a great day, everybody :o)

I am leaving, I am leaving
But the fighter still remains

Farewell, North Carolina. I think a little James Taylor might be in order too as I make the trip down to Florida tomorrow morning. But for now, S & G will suffice. I won’t be online until I find an apartment and plug in the phone line to the computer, so this will be the last post for a little while. I will send everyone my email and snail mail addresses whence I get settled. Prayers would be appreciated. I feel very alone at the moment, but I know the Lord is watching over everything I do and orchestrating events. I just wish folks would at least be in town when I move 9 hours down the road… But that’s the selfish me talking. I need to get packing–I have to stay alert tomorrow; no time to change out of lert form.

:o) And with that bit of corniness I will leave this fine state.

*waves*

Slow Saturdays… I really need to finish packing. What’s daunting about the situation isn’t the packing, but the things I need to take care of when I get down there: apartment, phone, internet, car, and the list goes on, not mention the job. I think lists will be my companions in the coming weeks.

Once again, I had way to many conversation hearts, then I went and watched my brother play 007 on the PS2–bad idea. It’s a first-person shooter type of game, which means all you can see is the weapon floating there in front of you, so my vision and inner-ear sensations were not coordinating, combined with too much sugar… Yeah. I had to leave the room. I think I’m still experiencing the residual effects of that… No, I didn’t heave, but it wasn’t pleasant, neither.

Feeling overwhelmed, anyone?

It’s Friday; let the transition commence. On Monday I will be in a new state with a new job and a whole new set of responsibilities. I honestly can’t wait for it to start.

Cleo’s (our cat’s) motor is on permanently today. It’s so beautiful outside, and she’s expressing her approval…

Rock climbing yesterday was a lot of fun. It’s definitely something I’m going to continue doing, even if I can’t talk any of the guys at work into doing it with me. There’s something about that is just the pure essence of a challenge–going straight up, fighting the most basic force in nature, gravity. I could wax poetic about it all day, suffice it to say that it rules; try it :o)

Tonight is the last hurrah for friends in the area. We’re going out to a nice restaurant, to laugh and carry on in each others’ company. Perhaps I’ll have some wine; who knows. I’m sure it will be bittersweet by the end. Now, to make reservations…

My rustoration project and vehicular inheritance…

For sale to a good home

Another view of the cute for sale car.