I haven’t felt an inspiration to write much in here over the past week. It’s not that I haven’t been busy; I have, but… Activity and inspiration are two separate commodities.
What I wrote Susan this morning:
As requested, here’s the scoop from the date last night :)
It went really well, I thought. We had lots to talk about. It was at 6:30 at Panera, so I had to fight traffic to get over there, but I gave myself enough of a buffer that I got there on time and sat outside for a minute or two before she arrived. I never got a chance to get that sport jacket, and I really wish I had, since I felt woefully underdressed. I don’t think she had changed out of her clothes from school, and I was going for a casual look, but I think I went too far in that direction, wearing jeans, sneakers, and a nice, untucked button-down shirt.
She was absolutely, completely beautiful. It’s a total miracle that I was able to keep my wits about me more or less the whole time. She was of course the same Sarah that I knew back in college, but an older, more mature, more womanly expression (in every possible good way) of the girl that I knew. Amazing. Even now, words fail me.
We walked in, and it took us a few minutes to find our feet conversationally, a process made all the more difficult by the fact that we were trying to order food at the same time. We found a seat by a window, prayed, and dug in. We talked about family, what we’d been up to since college, running, our respective church small groups, plans for the future, among other things. I asked a lot of questions, and gave her a chance to ask some too, and she did. There weren’t many lulls in the conversation, and when there were it was usually because we had both taken bites of our sandwiches simultaneously.
As far as her demeanor and personality, she was similar to what I had remembered, but at the same time, after all my expectations and whatnot, she came down off the pedestal somewhat, in the very best way. For all my anticipation and feeling like she would be unattainable, unapproachable, I could feel her awkwardness at times in the conversation, and in the end she just seemed like someone, like me, who was trying to find her direction for the next few years, busy, searching for purpose, with insecurities and hesitations just like anyone.
I did make it a point to let her know, at least obliquely, why I had invited her on the date. I said something to the effect of, “I mentioned earlier that not keeping up with my IVCF friends from college was something I really regretted, and while that’s true in a general sense, in a more specific sense you were someone that I really regretted not pursuing a friendship with.” I said a few things after that but don’t really remember what.
So we still have the standing invitation for a double tennis game. Maybe Saturday afternoon. Other than that, I have a couple of ideas like a stargazing date (need to break out the telescope this fall) and just offering to keep her company at Barnes & Noble as she draws up lesson plans (I always have reading to do too). We’ll see what happens.
Hope you’re having a great morning :)
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AWWWW :)
God I’m such a girl. But really.
That’s . . . picturesque. Beautiful. Like a fairy tale, almost.
The store manager where I work told me the other day that he knew before he met his wife that she was the one for him. Do you get that kind of a feeling? Most of the people at my store, actually, told me that they just ‘knew.’
I envy that :)
She could be. At this point, from what I know, without idealizing, she’s as close as anyone has ever come to my ideal. I think knowing entails a certain amount of confidence that you’ll end up with them in the end, and as much as I’d like it, I just don’t indulge myself in that amount of confidence. God may have other plans or be trying to teach me something else through this experience (which, incidentally, would hurt like hell), but in the meantime, by golly, I’m going to live it to the hilt. The challenge I think will be not coming on too strong at this point in our friendship but using a certain amount of wisdom and restraint in planning events together.
Well, the challenge is that (what I mentioned) and not thinking about it too much. I’ve been fanatically productive lately trying to occupy my mind, but it’s like bailing water with a dixie cup.
*sigh*
:)
hey, i’m glad aaron added you to the evite for our halloween party.. should should come and bring this new girl… would i know her from iv?
It’s very possible. Do you know Sarah Puffer?
Thanks so much for the invite to the Halloween party :) My roommates and I had already planned a get-togther at our apartment before I got the evite, so… We’ll have to see how things shake out over the next week or so. I’ll keep you in the loop :)
i don’t think i know her… i was 2 yrs behind you in iv and didn’t really even get into it until sophomore year.