Some days it just feels like I’m in a sort of endless time loop working here at the university… Like time repeats itself over and over and I just get older. Spring commencement is rolling around again. I think about all the upperclassmen who go here and how not so long ago my friends and I were in that category, but now…things are more amorphous, indefinite, shapeless in the realm of those I’m in contact with regularly. New friends spring up for a few months at a time and then fall away again just as effortlessly. And even if it’s desired, resuming things is hard sometimes because our lives move along tangential arcs, only in contact for a short while, as opposed to the more parallel lines of a college environment. Who knows what a few short months will do.
I think about graduating seniors and my first instinct is to think, “Well I’m just a little older than that,” and then I remember that it will have been four years come this fall. My youngest brother will be a junior. In college. And my life is slowly, inexorably moving away from that era, but working here keeps it on the forefront of my thoughts.
It’s a beautiful day. Cool, clear, and breezy. My window’s open to city noises outside.