The day is winding down amidst deep discussions and gum wrappers on my desk. I’ve unearthed the Baz Luhrmann “Everybody’s Free to Wear Sunscreen” song again… Perhaps it’s a sign of a renewed appriciation for the value of sound advice. I had to go to court on Tuesday to plead not guilty to a traffic violation (it’s a long story–suffice it to say that it was frivolous and unfair). The court date was 9:30 a.m. and due to a complex interaction of circumstances (mostly my negligence) I arrived home (where I was supposed to meet my dad and us both leave) around 7 a.m., by which time he had been gone for a good 15 fifteen minutes. I hadn’t called; I hadn’t given any notice to them as to my wherabouts. My mom was in tears; she was so angry at me. She’s hard to upset too much. I felt 3 inches tall; I deserved every reprimanding word I received. My father was waiting at a hotel; I met up with him and we spent the day in court and on the road. If there’s a shining example of God’s grace in my life, it’s my parents. They’ve given me chance after chance after chance while I’ve abused their favor, been irresponsible and inconsiderate, and hurt them so deeply. The look in my mom’s eyes changed me. Something clicked. I know I’ve said this myriad times before, but the resolution is there. It’s not going away this time. I will not take God’s or their sustenance for granted; not anymore.
wow… i didn’t know that she had cried.
though… when i think about it, i think my mom would cry if she knew half the things i don’t tell her.
*sigh*
i want to change. i do.