tu es la seule chose dont je connais
The stars have been brilliant the past two nights. I walked out to my car from Diane’s, just as I do every night, and from the bottom of my tree ravine there in the street I looked up and saw Cygnus flying majestically in the ribbon of sky above. Cassiopeia was in full tilt and Vega was near the zenith. Fall stars… Orion will be back soon.
I haven’t flown in about three months, since late June, if I recall correctly. My time has been occupied with such truly joyful tasks as building my relationship with Diane and Luke, a relationship that ought to occupy the front burner, and does. But my eyes still turn toward the skies frequently. I was surprised this chilly morning in putting on my leather jacket for the first time since April at how the emotions from that time came flooding back with the texture and scent of the leather. I remembered long cross-country flights, the end of the semester, warming days and most prominently, the hesitant first steps into my relationship with Diane. The convergence of overlapping memory and emotion overwhelmed me to such a degree–and I have such an enthusiasm for that sort of thing–that I couldn’t wear the jacket. The senses remember more than we think they do.
I want to fly regularly, but at $90/hour from the local airport, the cost is prohibitive. That said, there are other avenues, such as the Civil Air Patrol that offer much lower rental rates (in the order of $30-40/hour) in exchange for volunteer assistance, something I am more than happy to provide. The latter rate is sustainable. We’ll see.
So the whole getting a job that involves and maybe even requires flying is out? I know we talked a little about some of your plans, but i haven’t really kept up with what’s going on.
The combination of leather and something you love is powerful. I mean, each one of those things are powerful in their own right…but there’s something about the sensory perception of leather that heightens other emotions. Dunno why. I mean, i get the same thing when i put on my bike jacket…but it’s not leather. I think if it was leather than i, too, would have the same reaction.
(Oh, and i may be getting another bike here in the near future. I’ve been bitten by the bike bug again since Fuller got one back in June and it hasn’t let go ever since.)
I’m glad to see that you not only have your priorities, but that you’re living them out. So often we find ourselves doing otherwise and it winds up making us miserable. So as much as you feel loss with this one thing, the happiness and reward of spending your time on something that’s even more important to you will more than make up for it. And who knows…someday maybe you’ll get both. Now that would be a good day, no? ;)
~jd
Hey John. Unfortunately getting the kind of job that involves flying almost always requires a commercial pilot license, which requires much more training (~250 hours + instrument license) than what I have currently. So we’ll see what, if anything, God has in store for me there.
Cool about the bike plans! I knew you couldn’t stay away for long :)
Your last paragraph is right on. Thank you for the encouragement, John. Is your mail being forwarded? We sent you and Kristi an invite to the wedding in November.
Ah. That makes sense. Oh well. At least you got to learn a new skill passably well…well enough to be able to pick it up in the future with relative ease (after you make all your money and have your own plane and everything ;). And we thought cars were expensive…
Yeah, we’re getting our mail forwarded via Daniel and Trish who are living there at the moment. I appreciate the invitation and would love to make it somehow, but i’m not sure if we’ll be able to. I’m actually heading back home tomorrow for the weekend as my grandfather just died and i’m attending his memorial service over in Boone. Between that and buying a house…well, let’s just say i’ve been spending a little more than even I’m comfortable with. But we’ll see…
Im sorry to hear about your grandfather. My grandmother died a year ago and her memorial service was also in Boone. That was my home away from home. Family up there, I take it?
I’m sorry to hear about your grandfather! My mom’s mother is the only grandparent we have left and I can’t imagine what it will be like to lose her. Safe travels. You’re in our prayers.
Thanks, guys.
I was actually able to fly back for the memorial service, and it was really a great trip. I got to see a lot of the guys back home as well as family i haven’t seen in years at the service. It was a very emotional time, but one of those good, genuine, times when everyone is just open and honest and eager to connect with each other. It really could not have been a better weekend. And as a bonus, i got to drive my car and enjoy the mountains for a bit. (Kansas is pretty dang flat.)
Hope ya’ll are well!
~jd