andalou
Sometimes, when I don’t have change and have to use a dollar bill in the Coke machine just outside the office door, I maliciously hold the dollar bill for a second or two while the machine tries to suck it in. I justify it with grandiose overtones, saying it symbolizes in a token way my rebellion against the ever-increasing glut of automation in the world today, but really it’s just kind of fun.
Diane sent off our wedding invitations yesterday. It will be on November 11th. Talk about crossing the Rubicon… Wedding invitations are well-nigh irrevocable. People ask me whether it is “scary;” I always respond that while I am not scared, I have a healthy respect for the magnitude of the institution and the changes that will occur in my life. But even so… I would be lying if I said hearing the invites were sent off didn’t precipitate a deep breath and a determined, “Okay.”
Work plods along. Some days I feel very much like I am fighting against the current of complacency. It is so easy here to sink into the routine of work, home, sleep, work, home, sleep, etc. Something rises in me, grasping for meaning to transcend the day-to-day. Everyone goes through this process, whether consciously or subconsciously. We might be self-aware enough to step back and realize we need transcendent meaning in our lives, or we may immerse ourselves in work, home life or any pursuit without stopping to ponder why it is we have such a strong compulsion to invest ourselves in that pursuit.
We need a transcendent source of meaning, though, without any undercurrent, however buried, of futility. This does exist. It is a false logic to ascribe to a belief system simply because it gives life meaning (I could worship a rock or a tree and say it gave my life meaning); I am a Christian not because it gives my life meaning but because the Bible is true. It’s the difference between tacking Christianity on as a sort of hobby-like appendage to my life and building my life on the reality of the Word. Where do my assumptions play in? Do I allow the Bible to define my assumptions (God exists, He has spoken into His creation, man is fallen, etc), or do I spread my Christianity like a gloss over assumptions (there is no absolute truth, man is basically good, etc) that are no different from the rest of the world’s? There’s the rub.
The second approach necessarily creates a discord between the spiritual and rational elements of life. It requires a “leap of faith” from the rational part of our lives that governs our day-to-day, but cannot supply meaning, and the spiritual part which has no relevance to our daily existence but gives our lives meaning and feeds our spiritual vacuum. Francis Schaeffer originated this concept, Nancy Pearcey built on it, and the more I learn, the more I see the wisdom and wide applicability of it.