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I’ve been something of a pack rat for as long as I can remember. The tendency manifests itself in the traditional ways–keeping old clothes that I never wear for far too long and hanging on to old schoolbooks and assignments, among other things. But my penchant for keeping things even extends in the area of relationships of any sort. I keep letters, postcards, clippings, e-mails, pictures, anything and everything.

Why do I do it? The things I keep don’t remind me exclusively of good times, so the reason doesn’t hinge solely on some flowery nostalgia. Mixed with the innocent, pleasant memories of moments past are certainly bits and pieces that conjure up less-than-pleasant situations and circumstances. And however tempting it might be to think so, the reason doesn’t revolve around an inability to “let go,” to disassociate myself from communicating with or even thinking about the person or people involved. I’ve kept things from friendships and relationships as far back as high school and before, ties I haven’t pursued or even given a second thought for years and years.

I think the reason I keep these things around is more closely tied to a misconception I’ve held for a long time. To put it concisely, I felt like since experiences and memories shape our personality as much as our natural predispositions, banishing those things would be symbolically “forgetting” part of my personal history that shaped who I am today. I told myself I would be excising a “part of myself.” As much as it conflicts with common sense, this is the underlying reason I held for clinging to these things as long as I had.

But I’ve come to reevaluate that premise. For one, it doesn’t ally with reality in the larger scope of how I process my memories. I think about my relationship with my parents and brothers, for example, and while I have a non-specific sense of their imperfection, I have much more difficulty conjuring up pointed examples of where I was let down than I do positive experiences. The latter come much more readily. I choose to focus on the good. This pattern extends to other experiences as well: my time in Florida, rough spots in college and afterward–if, when they cross my mind, as infrequently as they do without the aid of physical reminders hanging about, I dismiss them so quickly, what does it profit me to have tangible artifacts laying about? Absolutely nothing. I am not being dishonest with myself for dwelling on what is pure and right and good. I am not subversively “rewriting my own history.”

Most importantly, it’s a biblical principle:

“Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” — Phil. 3:12-14

“Everyone has heard about your obedience, so I am full of joy over you; but I want you to be wise about what is good, and innocent about what is evil.” — Romans 16:19

I want this principle to permate my life. The occasional memories I have are more than enough without the physical reminder of things long gone. I will keep things that remind me of wholly good times, but otherwise, from here my life will be very much uncluttered. It’s ironic that as zealous as I was to keep my life streamlined before, only the external trappings and day-to-day benefited: the unnecessary bonds I held with my past were still numerous. Time to change.