lest we forget how fragile we are
Jeff and I talked about it on the way back from the airport. Whether we’re meant to be pilots or mechanics out in the field.
After days like today I start wondering. My instructor and I did some Private License test prep, essentially going through every single maneuver and determining what to focus on between now and the test. The short answer for me today was almost everything. Some days, not often, but some days I feel like my body doesn’t remember how to do anything. Like I’ve just been treading water for the past six months. It’s discouraging to say the least, and the inevitable questions pop into my head about my natural ability to be a good pilot.
I didn’t get the coordination in the family, at least not the bulk of it. Paul and David, especially Paul, have always been much naturally gifted when it comes to activities involving hand-eye coordination (video games and such) and full-body manipulation (sports, etc). Which isn’t to say I’ve no ability whatsoever; I do, but their ascent of the learning curve always looked comparatively effortless. Aaron too–the speed with which they would all be able to hold their own at new and unfamiliar sports was amazing. Just as an example, I had been taking sporadic tennis lessons for well-on seven years when Aaron and I started playing regularly, and he, with no formal instruction and little prior experience, played at my level nearly from day one. They definitely have the gift.
And I wonder about the things I feel I am good at, that I enjoy. Like mechanical work. I can’t wait for Airframe & Powerplant (A&P) school in the fall–the prospect of focusing on the operation and maintenance of mechanical things in an academic setting is truly a win-win situation for me. I love tinkering and feel I’m good at it; I love flying too, but after days like today seeds of doubt that I have the level of talent it takes start to creep in.
But at the end of it all I always come back to conversations with Mr. Hahn, my first instructor, and things he shared during ground school. He talked about how he wasn’t the most natural pilot in the world, and how he was actually cut from Moody Bible College‘s aviation program (arguably the best program out there). He then came to Sugar Valley and MAI, finished his training and spent many successful years in Haiti as a missionary pilot. By all accounts he’s an excellent pilot and a stellar instructor. I asked him once during a flight debrief about what didn’t come naturally to him, and how he overcame it, but he never really gave me a straight answer. Not out of a desire to be elusive–I just don’t think anyone had ever really asked him that question before. But whatever the case, his situation is a testimony to the fact that even pilots without an overwhelmingly natural ability to pilot an airplane can still be used overseas.
Go Haiti!
Totally coincidental, I’m sure, but I heard on the radio coming over the mountain that there’s some hubbub going on in Haiti right now with the missionary pilots and for some reason some of their flights are being delayed or something… I didn’t catch the whole story, but I was like, “Hey! That’s like Matt!” and I think my exclamatory shout distracted me from hearing the vital details in the story…
At any rate, I looked it up, and doubt and timidity can both be defined as “lack of confidence in,” so I think it would be appropriate to read II Timothy 1:7 as “For God did not give us a spirit of [doubt], but a spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline.”
And to quote from you a few times… :::clearing throat:::
Long comment, I know… but the point is, you’re meant to do this. And when God means for you to do something you’ll end up doing it. He’ll provide the way, the skills, the natural ability, the confidence, the financial means… everything. All you have to do is go along with Him; the only other option involves something like a large fish and rather unpleasant smells once you do get where he wants you to be! : )
the only other option involves something like a large fish and rather unpleasant smells once you do get where he wants you to be
Very true :) Thanks Elizabeth.
That’s what I’m here for : )