This is the first time I’ve noticed that it’s affected my outlook and productivity. Normally, these things only register as a speedbump in my daily routine and I can cruise right through them. But this week, I feel down. I felt an extreme lack of motivation yesterday (last night notwithstanding), and today is worse. In my moments alone, I’ve felt pensive, and quiet, and introspective, and even a bit melancholy. There’s a soft beauty to the feeling, but for extended periods of time it’s not fun, especially when my muse has gone and I can’t take advantage of the moments and divulge them into poetry. I honestly think I need to buy a roll of register tape and a crappy pen. I think I wrote more poetry in the past two months than I had in all the previous months combined. This is a lot for me. We’ll see. I just feel weary, and worn, and tired. It’s a self-reinforcing state, too, since my lack of motivation means that things sometimes pile up, and I get behind, and then I feel more stressed, augmenting the weariness, and so on and so forth. I don’t like it at all.
Prayers appreciated.
Patience, Matt