the effect of education, i suppose
P’s college orientation session was earlier this afternoon. It was long, but engaging, and very well thought-out. D accompanied us. We had already done the bulk of what they recommended (registering for classes, figuring out financial aid, getting her student ID, etc), but it was good to hear it reinforced, and to have someone official fill in the gaps in my knowledge of the process, especially when it comes to financial aid. P was a good sport during the campus-wide scavenger hunt, and even made a friend, although since her friend will be starting the pre-nursing program, and P will be studying art, it’s unlikely they’ll share any classes. I asked if they had traded contact info, and P said they hadn’t, which felt a little silly. I want her to excel academically, obviously, but most of all, I want her to find “her people” after years of feeling like something of an outsider, a misfit, in high school (even though she has a great group of girlfriends who love her to pieces) and also, to be pushed artistically. We checked out the studio spaces after orientation concluded, and to our delight, the rooms were open and unoccupied. I don’t know that she’ll have her own desk space like she did at Design Camp last year, but otherwise, there’s a lot of overlap between the two environments. She looked very comfortable and excited, all the more when she saw the lesson outline still on the whiteboard covering a lot of advanced composition and art theory, something for her to sink her teeth into after years of re-covering the basics with the lowest common denominator in high school art. I think she left feeling encouraged.
Apropos, here’s an incident that made my day. I was sitting in the library near the new book arrivals, listening to one of the orientation guides explain to the students how to check their college email and do other computer things, when the librarian interrupted her to address the whole group of 50-odd incoming students: “Is there a P_____ here who works at _____ _____?” Apparently P had dropped her work name tag (which she keeps in her purse), and the librarian had noticed it and knew it likely belonged to one of the orientees. P sheepishly identified herself and claimed her name tag, but I could tell without seeing her (I was on the other side of a partition) that she probably wanted to crawl into a hole in the ground out of embarrassment now that all her future classmates knew her name and where she worked. Little moments like that make being the dad of a teenager worthwhile.
On a more serious note, for my part, it was difficult to be back on campus, especially in the library and around the Humanities building. I felt the weight of past emotions surging toward me through the walls, ambushing me from the little visual touchstones on the grounds, restless, a touch paranoid. But—there’s nothing for it except to be there for the kids, and they won’t be there forever, so I’ll just make the best of it on the days when I’m camping out in the library or elsewhere while they’re in class. I’ll stay focused, stay on task, and who knows, maybe the keyed-up feeling will help me be more productive. We’ll see when the semester starts in a couple of weeks.